


A better path.

by RiahXIII



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-12
Updated: 2016-12-01
Packaged: 2018-08-22 01:53:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8268287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RiahXIII/pseuds/RiahXIII
Summary: No way. He was not going to be okay. He had already forget about it. He did not deserve it. He did not deserve her.  But the sky was no longer grey when looking at it. He wondered why.WARNING: it could contain explicit (sexual and violence) content.





	1. the girl of the icecream jar

**Author's Note:**

> (spoilers from Seven route and Secret endings 01 and 02!!!!!)  
> Hello there! This is my first post here so I hope everything's okay! I love all mm characters, especially Seven and Saeran. And after seing secret ending 02, I felt the urge of writing about him (wtf I wanted to see my boy being happy not awkwardly left in a corner with sad puppy eyes) sooooooo I'll try my best. A lot of angst coming though. Also, I'm not an english native speaker ( I'm spanish) plus I speak another four languages, so forgive me for any mistakes.  
> IMPORTANT: As it looked weird to write "M/C" everytime I was refering to her, I ended up naming her Lizzie, which is a soft and beautiful name. So, remember: M/C=LIZZIE.  
> Hope you enjoy it!  
> (More notes at the end)  
> Edit: Please, leave a Kudo if you like it! it means a lot. Also, it would keep me updating.

Too loud. They were too fucking loud. Saeran glared at his brother Saeyoung, who was tickling and joking arround with Lizzie, both laughing whit joy. Jeez, it had been over seven months since the marriage and they still acted like newlyweds. It was so annoying.  
-Could you two please stop? You're making me cringe.  
-Stop doing what? Being adorable?- Answered his twin brother without even looking at him. God. He was unbearable.  
-Whatever. I'm going for a walk.  
-But isn't it too late?- This time was Lizzie answering, now with a frown on her face. Saeran looked back at her with irritation. I was not like he dind't like her. He did. He was even jealous of Saeyoung for having everything he would never dare to wish for. But he was indeed tired of her treating him like a child. Why would she care about him?  
-I'm fine.If you want a baby, why don't you two make one?- Bingo. Lizzie bit her bottom lip, and he could tell she was hurt just by looking at her eyes. Saeyoung took a deep breathe, holding hands with her, while Saeran opened the door and welcomed the refreshing late night air.  
The sky was beautifully full of stars.  
He wandered for a while, finding relief in the emptiness of the dark. He let out a disgusted groan. Why was he living there? Most important, how in the world they were able to stand him? For god's sake, he was hateful. All what he did was moaning and yelling and hurting others. So, where was the point? Why did they wanted him so desperately? Sitting in a bench, the boy looked up at the sky. Wouldn't it be better... if he was up there?

-The sky is so beautiful today, isn't it'? I can almost sense the stars winking at us... It's giving me goosebumps.

Saeran gasped in surprise. The voice came from a red-brown haired girl, who sat next to him. She grined at him, and her light brown eyes were the warmest thing Saeran ever looked at.  
-Who are you? Is it your hobby saying dumb things to random strangers?- He nervously asked in return, feeling uneasy. He hated people being that close to him. But she was likely unawared.  
-I just felt tired, so I decided to sit somewhere. And you happened to be here.- The girl then stared at him, with a look of excitement.- Also, I must do something important, and It can't be done while standing. It would break the whole atmosphere, dude. Do you want to-  
-No, I don't. You have plenty of benchs here. Empty benchs. Get lost.- The young man looked down, not being able to stand her looking at him like that. She pouted, squeezing a bag against her chest.  
-A-Anyway, I'm going to stay here. Feel free to leave.  
Saeran snorted. Who the hell was this girl? He wanted to be alone, but he was not going anywhere. He arrived first. He looked at the girl starting a complain, but then stopped, raising both eyebrows.The young woman, still with a pout on her face, was now eating icecream.  
-What the hell are you doing?  
-I though you didn't mind.  
-You're right, I dont.- That damned girl. She was driving him insane. But suddenly she sighted and started talking again.  
-You know? Today's my birthday, so usually I would be eating icecream with my dad in some strange place he had picked up before. It was a tradition. But here I am, enjoying it with a grumpy tomato.

Grumpy tomato?

-No, I think you're a bit confused here. You're enjoying it by yourself.  
She did not seem to care about his comment and went on.  
-He died in a car accident two years ago. I miss him like nuts... so I wanted to feel like he was with me once again. But it's not working. Anyway. Please, forgive me for bothering you. I hope you understand.  
The girl looked at him with a bright smile, and he suddenly blushed. Why was she smiling? And, above all, why was him feeling sorry for her?  
-N-no, I don't. I've never had a father. So keep your stupid thoughts about fatherly love inside your head.  
\- Huh? You've never had a father? You grow up of a plant or something?  
-.... Is that supposed to be a joke?  
-Haha, you got me.-.Suddenly, the girl stood up, sighting and smiling.- It is late. I should go back studying if I don't want to fail my exams. It was stupid of me to come here on the first place.  
She left, but Saeran called her back.  
-Hey, nut, your icecream. You left it.  
She turned for a moment, all smiles.  
-Yes...You seems to need it more than myself.  
And then she ran. What in the world was wrong with her? ... icecream? Why would he need icecream? Anyway, the red haired boy looked at the left jar. He did love chocolate icecream. Even if it was left by an odious human being... he loved icecream. He started to eat, thoughtful. What a strange feeling had been left with that icecream.


	2. Saturday with a smell of sweets. PART ONE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY I KNOW I'M LATE BUT I WAS SO BUSY WITH UNIVERSITY  
> Also, this is just part one. Part two coming very very soon

Saeran groaned. Judging by the dazzing light that entered through the window and made him squeeze his eyes shut, it wasn't too early. But even so, he wanted to sleep more. He needed it. Why the hell was someone knocking on his door?

 

"Saeran, can I come in?". Of course it was her. The boy snorted. Who else woud it be? Saeyoung never bothered to knock. He moaned affirmetively, rubbing his face in an attemp of completly wake up. He looked a lot disheveled, but it was not like he cared. She had seen him in so many bad ways before. The girl carefully opened the door and came in, shyly pushing aside a pile of clothes at the end of the bed so she could sit. Saeran sat up, yawning, and gazed at her with narrowed eyes. He was not a morning person.

 

"You woke me up" he sneered, scrubbing his eyes. She looked down, playing with her thumbs and muttering an apologize. What was that? Saeran raised an eyebrow. No matter how harsh was him to her, she always grinned and laughed and all. He was starting to get nervous. Not good. "Are you just going to stay here staring at the damn floor like a lost puppy? Did you came for nothing?"

"N-no" she wavered, helding onto the words that she was trying to say. "I just wanted to... you know... about what you said yesterday..." He glanced at her, mouth slightly open.

"Don't you... You're not pregnant, are you?"

"No! I mean, not that I don't like the idea, but" she stopped at Saeran's look of rejection and cleared her throat, blushing. "I am not pregnant. Forget what I said. Reset button."

 

 He rolled his eyes, now leaning against the wall while stretching his arms. She started to talk again softening her voice. "Look... I hope you know it's not my intention to bother you. I just get worried at something bad happening, because I do care. Me, and your brother, and-"

"Oh, c'mon, are you serious? Fuck it" He grumbled, interrupting her and trying to hide the feeling of heaviness that was rising from his insides. "Don't act as if you care about me. Saeyoung does it all the time, and it's annoying" She glared at him trying to shoot a reply, but he moaned loudly, now resting his elbows on his knees, face being covered by his hands. "Yeah, I know, I know. You do care. Whatever. Are you done now?" He felt really sorry. Damn it, this woman was something. No wonder why his brother was so deep in love with her. She immediately put a big smile on her face, claping his hands and making Saeran to jump in surprise.

 

"No! We're not done. Today we are celebrating your seven-months-with-us-anniversaire! Congratulations~"

"What the fuck? Why are we... and why just celebrate the seven-" he couldn't finish the sentence as a loud voice coming from another room interrupted him.

"ISN'T THAT OBVIOUS?"

Saeran rolled his eyes. He was going to get blind with all the rolling eyes thing. "Of course. I forgot about my idiotic brother". mumbled the red-haired boy. "And what are we supposed to do today?"

"Why don't we go to take breakfast? I know a good place. Lots of sweet things, as you like." Lizzie looked so happy, his voice being a sing-song as she talked with excitement.

"Wow, it's sounds perfect!" grumbled Saeran, sarcastically “Just go with Saeyoung while I lock inside my room and do nothing for the rest of the day. So you two can enjoy a day off celebrating whatever you want to celebrate and I can enjoy a much needed day of peace." She pouted at him in response, crossing her arms with displeasure.

 

"It's your celebration, it won't make any sense if you don't come. Also, Saeyoung-"

"I CAN'T COME. TOO MUCH WORK. MY LIFE IS ALMOST OVER. SAERAN, IT IS YOUR TURN TO PLEASE THE PRINCESS." shouted Saeyoung, completing his wife's sentence. After a moment of silence (aside from Lizzie's giggles) he yelled again. "HUM, DON'T PLEASE HER. I MEAN, DON'T PLEASE "PLEASE" HER. JUST MAKE HER HAPPY. NO TOUCHING."

"As if I were to touch her" Saeran mumbled again. Unable to look at Lizzies anxious face, he let out a moan of frustration, giving in. "Fine! Alright, I'll go! I'll be out on a second. Just get the hell out of here so I can change."

"Yas!" his sister-in-law yelled in excitement, trying with all she might not to hug him. Saeran watched her went out of the room, closing the door not without first  throwing a quick glance at him, probably to make sure he wasn't lying when saying he'd come.

  
Saeran hissed.” I better get lots of sweets things” he winged for himself. What the hell was wrong with them? Seventh month anniversary? As if they were a threesome or something like that. It was probably an excuse to get him out of his room as he usually spent the days locked inside. But he wanted to avoid as much as possible any sort of contact with people (especially strangers), and he cherished the security his fourth walls provided him, like if it was his own paradise. His paradise… haha. It was disturbingly funny. Standing up, he took a white pullover and black pants and checked his phone. Zen, like every fucking day at whichever damned hour, was talking about his flawless looks. The red-haired put on a face of disdain; he could never get used at such narcissism.

 _Zen:_ But what if someone goes blind just by seeing my face? That would be awful! God, being me it's just too hard...  
_Yoosung:_ dude... stop with the I’m perfect thing for once. You're being such a jerk.  
_Zen:_ WHAT?!?!?! Yoosung, I was borned this way... Can't do anything about it.  
_Yoosung:_ yeah, I'm sure it's so tough ;;  
_Zen:_ IT IS!!  
* Lizzie has entered the chatroom*  
_Jaehee Kang:_ Zen can't really do something about his looks... Not his fault his that handsome.  
_Jaehee Kang:_ Hey Lizzie! You're here. How did the plan go?  
_Lizzie:_ Perfect! Everything done! We're about to leave~  
_Zen:_ Huh? Which plan?  
* 707 has entered the chatroom*  
_707_ :S  
_707:_ E  
_707:_ c  
_707:_ R  
707:E  
707:T  
Yoosung: Hey, I want to know too!  
707: Just something involving Saeran's mental health. Nothing to worry about. He'll be fine if he stops being so emo >.<

*Saeran has entered the chatroom*

Saeran: …

Saeran: 1. I’m not emo.

707: SAERAN YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE READING!

Zen: Dude… he’s a part of the chat. Of course he’s reading.

Saeran: 2. Don’t write like this. You’re annoying.

Saeran: 3. You’re supposed to be working. Stop being a sloth.

Yoosung: Haha Saeran…

Zen: lolol Saeyoung I think your brother just won.

Lizzie: HEY SAERAN we should be going… ^^

Saeran: And then why are you writing it? You’re in the same building as me.

Zen: Uh? But are you two going out? That’s kind of surprising…

707: Okay Saeran T_T

707: Yup! I can’t go since I have tones of work to finish, but they are going to a famous **coffee shop** which is known for doing overpowering delicious things… Such a shame that I can’t go… T-T

Lizzie: SAEYOUNG! DON’T CRY! I’LL BRING YOU THE SWEETEST OF THEM ALL.

707: Lizzie T_T Let’s get married again!

*Jaehee Kang has left the chatroom*

Yoosung: omg please stop.

Lizzie: Yas!!1 So this time we can do it at the space station <3

Zen: are they always that lovey dovey?

Saeran: …

Saeran: Someone kill me.

*Saeran has left the chatroom*

He sighted, opening the door to bump into Lizzie, who was smiling and lending him a scarf. “You’ll get a cold if you don’t keep yourself warm”. The gesture caused a faint blush on Saeran’s face. “Huh, whatever” he whispered, putting on his coat. Outside it was cold, and Saeran looked at the vapour arising from his mouth. Her sister-in-law giggled, singing more than speaking. “Are you ready for a walk?”

“No” he replyed, moving forward. She reached him in a blink, now laughing. “We’re gonna have fun~”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOTE: THIS IS NOT A M/C (Lizzie) AND SAERAN FANFIC. THEY'RE JUST FAMILY.  
> Ps: I love grumpy Saeran.


	3. Saturday with a smell of sweets PART 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> here i goooooooo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Sorry for posting this chapter in two parts, but I really wanted to make an update (and university won't let me... *sight*)  
> Saeran meets again the girl of the ice cream jar, yassssssssss

"Again... why are we here?"

Saeran tried not to panic as he looked at the coffee shop they were about to enter. It was  _crowded_. Gosh... there wasn't a single people-free spot in there. He was starting to sweat. 

"I already told you one hundred times. We're here to celebrate-"  
"I KNOW! My hellish seventh month anniversaire living with you two as a lovely family." He stopped her, loosing his temper, and she crossed arms, expectant. He started to look arround until he find a pub not too far away. "Look! There's a nicer place. Why cant we go there?"  
The girl raised an eyebrow, sighting. "Saeran, this is not my kind of "nice." He groaned nervously at her response. Damn,  _she was right._  That place looked like as if the Death itself was having a couple of beers with its old friends Darkness and Despair. "Also... I want you to taste Alya's cupcakes! They're to die for~"

"Well, I'm sure I'm going to die." He muttered to himself as the girl opened the door. Saeran hated to admit it but, surprisingly, the place was comfortable. The smell of sweets matched pefectly with the color and desing of the interior, and he could feel some kind of peace coming from the whole ensemble. They approached the counter, his sister-in-law sitting a stool away from him (she knew he still had hard times with people being too close to him, even if it was her or his brother), and he automatically ignored her talk with another girl (probably a waitress), staring at the window. Just watching the clouds wandering through the clear blue sky made him relax. 

"Grumpy tomato???"

He twirled his head in surprise as he heard  _that_  voice. "...Nut girl?" There she was, at the other side of the counter, staring at him with  _ **those**_ light brown eyeswide opened. He moaned, burying his head into his hands, as Lizzie looked at him, then at the girl and then back at him. She was surprised. Of course she was. Saeran was not good at making friends. He was not good at talking to people neither. To be honest, he was awful at settling any kind of relationship if the other part was not a computer nor a book. 

"WAIT! You two... know each other?" 

"Kind of~" Said the girl as Saeran whinged a mere "no". That whole damned situation was starting to be troublesome. He needed to explain it fast, other way Lizzie and Saeyoung would believe he was going out making friends. And then they would tease him. That was not going to happen.

"Long story made short: I was on a bench when she appeared saying non sense things. In a very nice way, I told her to get lost. That's it, happy ending and  all. Satisfied?"

"I'm not satisfied! You must be dumb if you think you're nice. Also, you forgot the part were you ate a whole jar of ice cream.  _My_ ice cream." Replyied the girl, pouting.

"What? You gave it to me! A-and I did not ate it, you idiot!"

"You did! Gotcha! I spyied on you! I hid and spyied you as you ate  it slowly, closing your eyes as a smile appea-"

"God, stop it!" He blushed, not being able to keep looking at her. "Wha-what if I ate the fucking ice cream? I like ice cream! Anyway, what the hell were you doing spying on me? Agh... don't tell me you have a thing on people eating? Disgusting."

"No I don't! I was just making sure you were eating it." He was thinking of a reply when Lizzie suddenly burst into laughs, making the ice cream girl to join her. Saeran knit his brows, complaining. 

"Okay, okay, I'm glad you two met, however it was" Lizzie wiped the tears that were starting to pop out from laughing. "Saeran, she's the girl I was talking you about. The famous Alya, delicacy maker." The boy glanced at her. Alya was such a beautiful name. The way she was blushing at the compliment was also beautiful, and... Wait. What was he thinking about? He looked down again, shily noding his head for all response. Lizzie kept talking, luckyly unawared of Saeran's embarassment."But, Ayla, I did not found you yesterday... did something happened?"

"Oh, no! Even thought the coffee is mine, I just work here a few days per week... Mostly afternoons. You know, this is not my only job, and I'm also studying, so I have not much time left." She then stoped, glancing at the ring on Lizzie's finger. "Hhm, it's him, er... your husband? The one you talked me about?"

Lizzie giggled. "Well, you could say... In fact, they look the same". 

"What? No way I'm your husband! You can be happy ever after with my idiotic twin. God. Just thinking about it gives me goosebumps." 

Alya sighted in... relief?  Why was she so relieved of him not being his husband? He internally rolled eyes. Of course, both girls seemed to be friends. He would be awful as a partner for life. Damned girl. She was smiling all the time. Was it posible for a human being?

"Twins! That's cool."

Saeran rolled eyes (this time for real) and snorted. "When are we eating? I came all this way  for nothing?"

"Oh, sure! Forgive me, I'm such a bad waitress. What would you like?

The red haired boy looked at his sister-in-law, rasing eyebrows, and she grined "Welp, since it's me who brought you here, I guess I'll have to decide~ Mmmm... what about two chocolate cupcakes, two pieces of red velvet cake and one giant cookie? Oh, and milkshake for two."

"Roger that!" Said Alya, and  _finally_  left, her medium-lenght hair swinging as she moved.

"...Are we going to eat all of this?" He said, trying to ignore his annoyingly increasing heart beats. 

"Yes, we are! You're not gonna regret it, wait and see!" She suddenly squinted her eyes, a smirk growing in her face. "So... you met a girl, uh? You kept it secret... I'm actually dissapointed."

Saeran blushed (god, it was the fourht time in less than half an hour) and left out a groan of frustation, his voice breaking in nervousness. " There was nothing to explain! God, you're so annoying, just as Saeyoung! And why do you think I'll have something to say about this dumb girl?"

"Well... judging by the way you blush everytime you look at her, I think-"  
"I AM NOT BLUSHING AND I AM NOT THINKING OF HER RIGHT NOW!" He yelled, probably too loud. Damn it! He glanced at Alya, hoping she was not listening. He sighted as she seemed oblivious of their conversation, and then looked back at Lizzie. She tighted her lips, trying to keep back another bunch of laughs, but she knew she was about to cross the line. He had reached his limits when coming there, and she was happily enough with it. The young woman was about to change the subject when a waitress brought them their command.

The boy inhaled unconsciously. Chocolate, red fruits, vanilla... It all smelled so dang delicious. Sweets were one of his favourite things, since he was not able to eat them being a kid (his mother won't let him, "you don't deserve it, Saeran"). He loved them. His eyes sparkled childishly as he tasted the first bite, and Lizzie proudly stared at him as he opened them wide.

"See... I told you". He noded, completely absorbed. They kept eating in silence, until a little chuckle brought them off of their thoughts. Alya was there, leaned on the counter, smiling and watching them enjoy the food she had made.

"You two seems to be enjoying it" She said, pleased.

"Yes! How did you... How in the world... This is so good! Heavenly!" Saeran let out a groan of excitement, finishing the milkshake. But as soon as he felt the look of confusion that Lizzie was giving him, he became flustered. God, he lost it. "Hum, I mean, It was not bad. But you have to improve some things."

They had paid in advance, and Lizzie looked at the hour, worried. "Oh my! Saeyoung must be starving to death waiting for us! He hasn't ate anything because I promised him to bring some things... Poor little dove..." Saeran sighted, thanking Lizzie for the interruption. He was not even able to look at Alya's face; by then, he was sure she thought he was an idiot. Not as he cared, anyway. He stood, modestly stretching his back, and looked down at his brother wife. "We better go. I don't want to hear Saeyoungs complains again." Lizzie noded and looked back at the ice cream girl. Alya. "It was nice to see you! I'll make sure I come when you're working so we can talk more often. Now, we'll get going! Goodbye~"

Saeran followed her through the tables full of people laughing and talking, like if this place was some kind of paradise they came to get rid of their worries. Suddenly something stopped him. He closed his eyes, deep breathing, and then turned arround.

"Alya..." He called her. He almost regretted saying her name as it sounded rough on his mouth. She tilted her head, expectant. "What... what does your name means?"

She gave him a big smile, her eyes shimmering. Pure, innocent. Everything on her was radiant, and Saeran stupidly thought he might need sunglasses to look at her.

"Heaven. It means Heaven."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay today I watched Saeran's secret ending for the second time and I died writing it. Please.... Saeran deserves some love.  
> ALYA PLEASE SAVE HIM


	4. French toasts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I thought I hated bread. Thinking about it, I do hate lots of things. What if it's just like that...? What if I just need to... try a little more?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S BEEN A LONG TIIIME  
> I'm writing another Saeran fanfic, and as it's more "popular", I decided to temporary stop with this one. Altough the other is not finished yet, 14 chapters are enough to relax a little, hahaha  
> Also, uni takes a loooooot of time, so it's not easy to find free time to write.  
> IMPORTANT: I DECIDED TO DO A CHANGE. I'LL WRITE FROM SAERAN'S POINT OF VIEW, AND IN PRESENT. I find it to be more easy, as I have yet some trouble with verbs in past. Also, it allows me to write about Saeran's thoughts more naturaly than with the 3rd person.  
> hope you like it <3

**Writer note: as I said on the actual "note", I'll be doing a few changes; the fic will be now (for the moment) writen on first person from Saeran's P.O.V (well that's the intention, but I guess I'll be alternating with other characters POV).**

The rain falls slowly, the droplets carefully racing trhough the window. I look down to the cup of hot chocolate, threads of smoke dancing from it.

"So, are you his boyfriend or not?" The short haired girl leans forward as she confidentally asks , smirking, both eyebrows enarched. I snort.

"I told you a milion times; there's no way I'm that stupid girl's <<boy-something>>"

Areum grunts at my answer, rolling eyes. "Then, why do you come here everyday? 

I ignore her, focusing on the street again. Gosh. Why is she so busybody? Why in the world would she think that I like Alya? In fact, I don't like women at all. It's just that... I like the place. I like the peace, I like the way it makes me feel; protected from the hell I live in. And, above all, of course, I love the food. I glance again at the waitress; is she going to keep looking at me like that? 

"Don't you have something to do, you creep?" 

"Staring at handsome ginger heads is actually something."

"Whatever." I spin, slightly leaning forward, resting my arms on the table. The chattering, the smell of sweets... Everything arround starts to slowly fade. When was the last time I slept properly? A week ago, maybe? My eyes feel heavy. Maybe If I just close them for a sec...

 

_It's dark, and I can't see. I want to cry, but Mommy told me not to. This smell... it's just humidity or urine? Saeyoung, where are you? I don't even know how much time has passed. I can't breathe; my heart is becoming a hole, and it's eating me. I hear something. Is that Mommy? No, no, no, no. I was not a good boy. She's going to hurt me. Is-is she touching me? NO, GET AWAY. PLEASE, DON'T COME. I'LL BE A GOOD BOY. I CAN'T BREATHE. I CAN'T BREATHE._

"SAERAN!" A voice pulls me out of the dark, and I sharply open my eyes.

"Where, where am I? Where is mommy? Please, make it  stop!" I yell. My lungs hurt and I can feel the wet of the tears on my face.

"Saeran, inhale. I'm here. Look at me!" I bump into Alya's frowned face, her light eyes opened with fear. What the hell is she doing? Where the hell am I doing?  _She's too close._ I fight to catch my breathe, placing both my hands at the top of my head, covertly pulling my hair. Pain makes it better. She tries to reach my hand, but I jerk up.

"Don't" I mutter under my faltering breathe, almost menacing. "Do not touch me. Get. Away."

The girl knits her brows, considering my damned words for a moment but, luckily, she gives up and sits on a chair while I try to put myself together. Fuck it! I must have fell asleep. I stand up, and a blanket falls off my shoulders.  Air... I need air. After opening the door, I glance at the girl, apparently determined to follow each and every one of my steps.

"Don't you even think of following me. I'm just... I'm okay. I'm just going to have a cig." 

The night breeze gently brushes my hair. I did not realize it was that late, but the moon is already up. Sitting on a bench infront the coffee, I sigh with relief when I find on my pocket the box of cigs. Lizzie would not be happy. Actually, it seems like I'll dissapoint everyone because due to my shitty health condition, I shoudn't be smoking. But who cares about it, anyway; if I die, they could go on with their fairy-tale lifes, happy endings and all. The villain's always punished.

I shiver again at the thought of the dream. No, not dream... nightmare. When will them stop the hunt? When will it all stop torturing me every single time I close my eyes? Sometimes it's just a feeling of fear when I wake up, but I never know when the real nightmare will come. I... I shouldn't have fell asleep here. Normally, Saeyoung's the one waking up to my screams; he hugs me while I cry myself to sleep. But now, here, alone.... I let the smoke slowly slip out of my mouth. Fuck. This is bad. This is so bad. 

"That's kind off a deja vu frm two weeks ago, don't you think so?" No. Not her again. What's wrong with that girl? She's got an obsesion. I thought she would be at least scared of me, with the whole screaming thing and all. But there she is; smiling like a damned puppy.

"I recall telling you to stay away from me" I mumble, fed up, trying to avoid her eyes.

"Yeeees, I remember it. But I want you to taste one of my specialities!" She's without a bunch of doubt the most tiresome person I've ever met. 

"Sorry, but I have no money left. Another day, okay?" Whatever she'd brought smells good, anyway. She laughs, and with a heavy heart, I look at her, who's shaking her head. Locks of brown hair are stucked on her forehead. She'd been sweating even though it's cold.

"It's for free, you idiot. A gift." A... A gift? Without any advice, my heart starts to jump and races, but it's not like the other times; this one, each beat is accompained by a warm and melting fire that tickles through my veins. A gift... Do I deserve to get gifts? I look at the plate she's offering me: is that some kind of pudding? I quickly scold myself for feeling that excited; she just feels sorry about me. Don't overreact, Saeran. 

"I-it doesn't smell bad. What is it?" I almost whisper, low key wishing she was not sitting just right beside of me. 

"French toast. They're so good" Hmm, I don't think so. Bread. Of all the things, she had to made bread. 

"Well, I happen to dislike bread." She looks at me slightly squeezing her eyes, her face becoming a frown.

"You don't like bread? Who in the hell doesn't like bread?"

"Well, you wouldn't like bread if bread crumbs were the only thing you would eat for days" I spit out, inmediately regretting it. Shit, I screwed up.I analyze her face in search of any sight of disdain, from her red full lips to the brown sparks on her eyes. But, somehow, se manages to just look a little puzzled for a fraction of second. Then, she just takes a deep breathe and looks at me, grining.

"Just taste it."

"I told you I don't like bread."

"Please?" I just... Damnit. She's so... I can't just ignore that imploring face. I normally don't care about others, or at least, that's what I want to think. So why in the hell would I want to make her happy? In an impulse, I bite the the first toast.

"And well? Is it good, or not?"  
I... I like it. Is sweet, and it melts on my mouth as I chew. I love it. I thought I hated bread. Thinking about it, I do hate lots of things. What If I just have to try a little harder? Am I lost, or am I losing life? I spin, so my face is now facing hers. 

"Teach me how to cook french toasts" I mutter, words sliping out of my mouth without even noticing it. She enarchs her left eyebrow, notoriously holding her laugh.

"Hmm, now there are no ingredients left. But maybe tomorrow you could come over and-"

"No, now." I don't let her finish her sentence. She doesn't understand. I need it now. I need to get away from the nightmares and I need to shut the voices darkly whispering on my mind. "Come to my house, I can ask for the ingredients."

She tilts her head and opens her motuh, but whatever she was about to say, she holds it. And then sighs, smiling. "O-kay. Wait for me here while I go finish closing the coffee."

She walks graciously; somehow, she resembles a cat. I lift my hand to my mouth, touching the corner of my lips. What was that? Was I smiling? I shake my head, atonished, reaching for my phone. Good; Saeyoung's online.

_Saeran has entered the chatroom_

**Saeran:**  Saeyoung, go buy ingredients for french toasts. Now.

 **Saeyoung:** Whaaaaaa?

 **Saeyoung:** What's with you all of a sudden?

_Saeran has left the chatroom._

**Author's Note:**

> It's me again!  
> I'm aware this first chapter is not too long, but I didn't want to elabourate on too much since it's like a prologue.  
> If you like it, do whatever you do on archiveofourown to say you like it, leave a comment or just enjoy it silently :)  
> Aaaaand I leave my twitter account here just in case anyone wants to read me complaining about life and making jokes at everything (although lately it's all about mm angst tbh)  
> @nera_chan


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